uh

I've been feeling sort of sad lately.  Not like depressed sad, but, well just not all that happy.  I know exactly what the reason is.  I haven't gotten to talk to him much in the past few days, that always puts me in a bit of a slump.  

I've been over thinking again, never a good sign.  Trust issues will always come back to bite me in the ass. People tend to never stick to their word when it comes to me.  I've been hurt so many times by so many people so I think to myself why would he be any different. 

The thing I keep thinking of is when he comes home, other girls will be around to distract him.  I wont be important anymore. I told him this.  He said there is nothing to worry about. 

I talked to my ex about it too. In a flood of emotion I said to him that I should just be a lesbian.  He asked why. I said well I do like boobs. He laughed and said seriously "You need to look in the mirror, you are far too good to loose to the other team." It was my turn to laugh. 

I guess he's right.  He might be bias though because he may still love me, which is unfortunate.  

I some how realized that I was being silly.  What happens will happen.  Thinking about it and making myself sad about it isn't going to change anything. 

Then I got his letter. It really made me believe that I was being truly silly. 

I still cant help to ask myself, too good to be true?